Zionsville Times Sentinel

Commentary

July 17, 2013

Snack cakes for everyone

Have you heard that Twinkies are back on store shelves? The only thing that really disturbs me about the resurgence of this beloved snack cake is the fact that they are advertising it will have a longer shelf life than the original version.

I am pretty sure that only original Twinkies and cockroaches could survive a nuclear winter, so I have to wonder exactly what it would take, besides a hungry kid, to destroy a new and improved Twinkie. Let me know if you find out, because I am not normally one to buy snack cakes.

Before you judge too harshly and pity my children, rest assured that they have eaten their share of snack cakes in the past, but never even ask for them at the store. The reason for their indifference to boxed snack cakes is simple: I make sweet treats for them at home that are fresh and would not withstand a nuclear holocaust. In fact, my version of the oatmeal pie snack is so popular at my house that I have to ration them to ensure everyone gets the same amount. Otherwise, it would be a feeding frenzy and someone would wind up crying because he or she did not eat fast enough. Spouse gave one away one time, and I nearly had kittens. See, they are kind of a pain in the rear end to make, and I didn’t even know the recipient of my hard work. I chose to overlook the fact that he was sharing his own ration, because I am awesome that way.

I tried to make those white snack cakes with chocolate stripes on them once. The cake and filling were both delicious, but I put the white chocolate on too thick and they were kind of gross. I will try again, though, because I am no quitter. Also, because they are my favorite of all snack cakes. My babies will be thrilled when I get it right.

See Wednesday's Times Sentinel for the full story.

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